My dad recently stated dating a Vietnamese woman. Since they started dating, I've realized the American culture is different from the Vietnamese culture.
For example: For the past couple of weeks I have been sick. When Tammy comes around me, see gets way to close to me. I politely say" You shouldn't be this close to me right now because you are going to catch this cold," but she doesn't understand because she stays at the same distance. The book related this cultural difference to behavioral language: names or things that imply people say or do certain things.
Another way American culture is different from the Vietnamese culture is they don't understand our language very well. It's very hard to get a joke across to someone that is from another part of the world because you have to explain the context of the joke to the point where its not funny anymore. For example: Most American’s know who Bill Engvall is. If you've seen his stand up shows, you know he’s famous because of there’s your sign. Although he has many of them, many of us know one off the top of our heads. However, if you were to try and explain a here’s your sign joke to someone from Vietnam or china, they probably wouldn't understand it.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Reaction's Playing off our Emotion's
Everyone shows emotion. However, we all express how we're feeling about a certian situation differently. For example: everyone reacts to September 11, 2001 differently. Many people knew someone working in the trade towers, near the trade towers,or maybe you knew some that was flying that day. Whatever your situation, we all have a recation about what happened that day.
Can you remember where you were when the first plan hit the World Trade Center? What were you feeling at that moment? I remember I was in seventh grade geography class when our princpial told us to gohome and be with our families. When I got home from school, they just kept replying the same news footage over and over again. Personally, every time I saw the plan's hit the building's, my heart started to race and I felt like I couldn't breath. The factor's I was expirencing at that given moment was physiological factors.
Nonverbal reactions can also have an affect on you emotions. For example: if I was to sweat, leave the room, or turn my head when the news played the same footage every fifteen minutes, people probably would be able to tell that I hada problemwithwhat happen that day, and that I'd rather not watch it.
Lastly, verbal expression.
Manypeople use languge to communicate what the are feeling. However,when that isn't possible, people use nonverbal and physiological factors to get their feels heard.
When our princpial told us togo home and be with our families the rest of the day, she was using verbal communicatin. This direct order lead people to panic and go home to their families.
Can you remember where you were when the first plan hit the World Trade Center? What were you feeling at that moment? I remember I was in seventh grade geography class when our princpial told us to gohome and be with our families. When I got home from school, they just kept replying the same news footage over and over again. Personally, every time I saw the plan's hit the building's, my heart started to race and I felt like I couldn't breath. The factor's I was expirencing at that given moment was physiological factors.
Nonverbal reactions can also have an affect on you emotions. For example: if I was to sweat, leave the room, or turn my head when the news played the same footage every fifteen minutes, people probably would be able to tell that I hada problemwithwhat happen that day, and that I'd rather not watch it.
Lastly, verbal expression.
Manypeople use languge to communicate what the are feeling. However,when that isn't possible, people use nonverbal and physiological factors to get their feels heard.
When our princpial told us togo home and be with our families the rest of the day, she was using verbal communicatin. This direct order lead people to panic and go home to their families.
The Pillow Method
The pillow method is a situation that has four sides to it like a pillow. The best example I can think of that relates to my life, but will affect others, is when I decided to moved up to my dad's so I could go to college.
Position 1: states I'm right and you’re wrong.
When I decided to move out of my mom's house, she wasn't too happy. Yes she was losing her baby, but I was also a big help around the house. I watched my little sisters and cleaned the house when needed. I knew she was going to miss that. However, I was more concerned about my needs, and what I needed to do to achieve the goals I want in life.
Position 2: Your right I'm wrong.
My dad was never in my life until I was older. When I want to go live with him, my mom was upset. She was the one who had taken care of me over the years. As far as she was concerned, she would make sure I would get into a college sooner or later.
Position 3: both right both wrong:
My mom was right when she said she cared for me and would see that I got into a good school if I stayed living with her. My mom was wrong in thinking she can have her children live with her forever. I was right that I needed to achieve my goals. However, I was wrong in thing I need to achieve them right away.
Position 4: This issue isn’t as important as it seems
Now that this issue has passed, It doesn't seem relevant anymore. At the time, we were at each other’s thoughts when it came to discussing the issue, but now when we look back on this situation it seemed like the best idea at the time.
Position 1: states I'm right and you’re wrong.
When I decided to move out of my mom's house, she wasn't too happy. Yes she was losing her baby, but I was also a big help around the house. I watched my little sisters and cleaned the house when needed. I knew she was going to miss that. However, I was more concerned about my needs, and what I needed to do to achieve the goals I want in life.
Position 2: Your right I'm wrong.
My dad was never in my life until I was older. When I want to go live with him, my mom was upset. She was the one who had taken care of me over the years. As far as she was concerned, she would make sure I would get into a college sooner or later.
Position 3: both right both wrong:
My mom was right when she said she cared for me and would see that I got into a good school if I stayed living with her. My mom was wrong in thinking she can have her children live with her forever. I was right that I needed to achieve my goals. However, I was wrong in thing I need to achieve them right away.
Position 4: This issue isn’t as important as it seems
Now that this issue has passed, It doesn't seem relevant anymore. At the time, we were at each other’s thoughts when it came to discussing the issue, but now when we look back on this situation it seemed like the best idea at the time.
Friday, October 2, 2009
empathy vrs smpathy
"Empathy is defined as being able to re create another person's perspcetive , to experience the world from another person's point of view." Pg 109
Many people have a hard time showing empathy, rather most people are good at expressing sympathy ina situation. I think I have trouble with both, but i'll give two situation's, and you can teel me which method you thinkI was expressing to the other communicator.
First situation:
My grandpa had a stroke six months ago. Since then, my grandma has had to rely on other'sto help her with task's suck as fixing the furnace. These things my grandpa would normally do, but since he's now ina nursing home, my dad has taken on the responsibility of helping his mother out. However, a every couple week trip turns into a every few day trips when my grandma has a sinus infection. Let me back up. A couple of days ago, my grandma starts calling my dad at 1:30 in the morning about the furnace. Although we know it's working, we think she is just sick. Finally my dad tells her not to turn up the heat because she will forget about it if she runs out for a few minutes. Nevertheless, she turns up the heat, and calls my dad because shes hot and forgot she turned up the heat.She wanted to know if he could come over and take another look at it?
When my dad got home from work, he told me what happened with grandma. I felt empathy for him because she has called me before and Iknow how hard it can be to shut her up, so to speak.
Now that I'man adult, I can smpathize with my parents when they say they have a lot of bills to pay. I have 120.00 worth of bills, and though I know its nothing copared to what my parents pay each month. I still have enoughto help them out finically.
Many people have a hard time showing empathy, rather most people are good at expressing sympathy ina situation. I think I have trouble with both, but i'll give two situation's, and you can teel me which method you thinkI was expressing to the other communicator.
First situation:
My grandpa had a stroke six months ago. Since then, my grandma has had to rely on other'sto help her with task's suck as fixing the furnace. These things my grandpa would normally do, but since he's now ina nursing home, my dad has taken on the responsibility of helping his mother out. However, a every couple week trip turns into a every few day trips when my grandma has a sinus infection. Let me back up. A couple of days ago, my grandma starts calling my dad at 1:30 in the morning about the furnace. Although we know it's working, we think she is just sick. Finally my dad tells her not to turn up the heat because she will forget about it if she runs out for a few minutes. Nevertheless, she turns up the heat, and calls my dad because shes hot and forgot she turned up the heat.She wanted to know if he could come over and take another look at it?
When my dad got home from work, he told me what happened with grandma. I felt empathy for him because she has called me before and Iknow how hard it can be to shut her up, so to speak.
Now that I'man adult, I can smpathize with my parents when they say they have a lot of bills to pay. I have 120.00 worth of bills, and though I know its nothing copared to what my parents pay each month. I still have enoughto help them out finically.
being sick
For the past two weeks I've been trying to overcome a cold. When I have a cold, I get a fever, sneeze, cough, and get the chills. The only thing I seem to want to do is lay around the house and drink orange juice.
When reading about perceptions in chapter three, I realized that health, and being tired are two perceptions that can affect a way someone acts.
When I have a cold, I am tired and don't want to do much of anything. It seems like people have to force me to do my homework right not. However, when I feel normal I get my assignments done on time, and spend my spare time cleaning the house and going to see my grandpa.
Whether I’m fatigued, hungry, or unhealthy, my actions are most appropriate when I’m awake, healthy, or full. I think this because when we are fatigued, sick, or hungry, our actions aren’t what they would be if we were full, awake, and healthy. For a better perspective we express ourselves better when we aren’t sick, tired, or hungry.
I have to go finish closing up my cabin this weekend, and because I’m sick it’s not going to be much fun. When we are sick, we still have to do things that we don’t want to do at that moment. However, how do we get the courage to go out and conger those activities? Even though I know I should rest, I feel terrible when I give myself a day to do so. I feel like I’ve been lazy all day, and that I’m going to have to make up a lot of work later. I’m sure this is different for every person, but I hope I find an answer for this question.
When reading about perceptions in chapter three, I realized that health, and being tired are two perceptions that can affect a way someone acts.
When I have a cold, I am tired and don't want to do much of anything. It seems like people have to force me to do my homework right not. However, when I feel normal I get my assignments done on time, and spend my spare time cleaning the house and going to see my grandpa.
Whether I’m fatigued, hungry, or unhealthy, my actions are most appropriate when I’m awake, healthy, or full. I think this because when we are fatigued, sick, or hungry, our actions aren’t what they would be if we were full, awake, and healthy. For a better perspective we express ourselves better when we aren’t sick, tired, or hungry.
I have to go finish closing up my cabin this weekend, and because I’m sick it’s not going to be much fun. When we are sick, we still have to do things that we don’t want to do at that moment. However, how do we get the courage to go out and conger those activities? Even though I know I should rest, I feel terrible when I give myself a day to do so. I feel like I’ve been lazy all day, and that I’m going to have to make up a lot of work later. I’m sure this is different for every person, but I hope I find an answer for this question.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)